Got an issue with your neighbors but don’t want to physically confront them? The latest trend among frustrated neighbors is to use funny WiFi names to send a passive-aggressive message. That way, every time someone within a few hundred feet goes to sign-in to a WiFi network, they will see your network’s name. It’s a perfect solution if you’re looking to avoid awkward face-to-face confrontations with a hostile or threatening person who lives nearby.
So if you have neighbors who leave cigarette butts everywhere, don’t pick up dog poop or have loud sex, then you might want to consider re-naming your network to something like this…
01) We Can Hear You Having Sex
If you’ve ever lived in an apartment building or had roommates before then you’ve probably had this problem. Letting your neighbors know that you can hear them might solve your problem. Then, on the other hand, it might make it worse.
02) Your Dog Shits In My Yard
Dog owners can be lazy sometimes. It’s not that hard to bring a poop bag with you.
A balcony can be both a blessing and a curse. Noise carries. Especially at night.
04) The Guy in 5C is Cheating On You
Good idea, but what happens if the person who is dating the guy in apartment 5C never tries to get on the WiFi?
05) Pls Pickup Your Cigarettes
Totally agree with this one. Tossing cigarette butts everywhere just makes the whole neighborhood look trashy.
06) Your Music is Annoying
Does your neighbor blast loud music throughout your building at all hours of the day or night? Quick piece of advice: If you use your WiFi to passive-aggressively communicate, you might want to use proper grammar.
07) Stop Stealing My Mail!
08) Get Your Own Net Bro
Is someone using your unprotected WiFi network and sucking up all of your bandwidth watching Netflix? Then lock it and rename it something like “GetYourOwnNetBro.”
09) QUIT STEALING MY PAPER
Tired of walking outside to get the morning paper only to discover it’s missing? You can try complaining about it with your WiFi SSID, but what if your smart-ass neighbors respond in kind?
Dog poop can make change a green lawn from a fun place for kids to play to a minefield of dangers.
11) Stop Putting Your Trash In The Hallway
Can’t wait to get that stinky bag of trash out of your apartment but don’t feel like taking it to the curb just yet? Well, your neighbors can’t wait for you to get your stinky trash out of the hallway. Don’t be lazy. Just take it out to the dumpster or trash cans.
12) Your Cooking Stinks Up Stairwell
Good or bad, smells travel. Open a window before your microwave fish dinner wafts up the stairs.
13) Shut The Barking Dog Up Apt #7
The passive-aggressive way to tell someone that they need to invest in a bark collar.
14) A Balcony Isn’t An Ashtray
Have you ever shared a balcony with a smoker? Yuck.
15) Apt #3 -> Go See a Therapist
The only thing worse than a long and loud fight with your significant other… is having to listen to someone else’s fight.
16) Stop Selling Drugs
Are your neighbors selling drugs? If so, you probably have all sorts of sketchy people hanging around your property. Telling them to stop via WiFi might help convince them to stop. If it doesn’t, then check out the next item.
17) DEA Surveillance Van
If you really want to freak out your drug selling neighbors, then naming your WiFi something like “DEA Surveillance Van.” It should properly freakout the high and already ultra-paranoid.
18) Your Dog Barks All Day
If you’re a dog owner, how do you know if your dog barks all day when you’re not home… unless your neighbors tell you?
19) Stop Wearing Heels In The Morning
Someone wearing high heels as they frantically get ready for work in the morning can be especially annoying to someone downstairs…. especially when they don’t have to wake up early in the morning.
20) Really, asshole? Curry Again?
Cooking odors can go either way. Smell fantastic and make you jealous or make you want to puke.
Funny WiFi Names
If you think about it, passive-aggressively communicating with your neighbors basically the digital equivalent of an angry Post-It note.