• Skip to main content
  • Skip to header right navigation
  • Skip to site footer
  • About
  • Contact
  • Subscribe
  • Advertise
method logo sxs 280x96 wht

methodshop

tech news, reviews & how to's

  • Trending
  • Latest
  • Tech
    • Apps
    • Internet
    • Software
    • Security
    • Games
    • Advertising
  • Life
    • Entertainment
    • TV & Film
    • Music
    • Health & Science
    • Family
    • Social Media
    • Food
    • Style
  • Learn
    • Tutorials
    • Reviews
    • News
      • Business
      • Crime
      • Politics
  • Fun
    • Featured
    • Humor
    • Holiday

Home : The Bizarre, The Bad, The Bawdy Baseball Names

The Bizarre, The Bad, The Bawdy Baseball Names

Jun 14, 2007 by jayfrankwilson
FacebookTweetPinLinkedIn
Reading Time: 2 minutes

The Bizarre, The Bad, The Bawdy Baseball Names - Kuntz 1There have been many dicks in the annals of baseball. I’m not talking about Ty Cobb or Barry Bonds. I’m talking Dick Cox and Dick Manville. Dick Hoover and Dick Pole. To date, 131 Dicks have taken the field as part of Major League Baseball (not including dicks of the lowercase variety). But there’s also been at least one Kuntz. One Boozer. And one Putz. The history of bizarre, bawdy and just plain bad baseball names is long and fascinating. This is a tribute to those men who lost out in the lottery of baseball names (this is also a chance to laugh at them).

KUNTZ AND RANDYS

RUSTY KUNTZ Kuntz had a .236 lifetime batting average — seems his bat was rusty, too. Good ol’ Rusty. I cherish my Rusty Kuntz baseball cards more than anything. They’re worth about a nickel apiece, but the joy I got out of seeing the name “Rusty Kuntz” is priceless. He inspired this list and my fascination for bad baseball names. Thanks, Kuntz!

RANDY JOHNSON It sounds like a nice enough name — then, upon further inspection, you’ll discover it is the filthiest name in baseball history. Let’s do the math. Randy = horny. As in “Do I make you randy?” Johnson = penis. As in “My johnson itches in this jock!” That makes Randy Johnson a double threat and just another way of saying “horny penis.” Maybe it’s not a coincidence that his nickname is the Big Unit, which, again, is just another way of saying “horny penis.” (Note: To be fair, there have been three Randy Johnsons in the history of baseball. The other two were position players in the early ’80s.)

RANDY BUSH Just as Superman has Bizarro, Randy Johnson has Randy Bush. Unfortunately, the baseball gods never saw fit to have these two double sexual innuendoes face each other. Outfielder Randy B. was in the American League while pitcher Randy J. was in the National, so the world never got to see what would happen if a randy bush squared off against a randy johnson. We know who’d win this one, though, don’t we fellas?

A GAYLORD, A BOOZER, A PUTZ

GAYLORD PERRY Truly one of my all-time favorite baseball names. He was not only named Gaylord. And Perry. He was famous for spitting on his balls. Gaylord Perry has the gayest name since the late 19th century infielder Pussyfoot Hymen. But Pussyfoot isn’t in the Hall of Fame, is he?






TIM SPOONEYBARGER His name doesn’t have any sexual connotation. It’s just freakin’ stupid. Say it out loud. Spooney-barger! Now, try not to laugh. Spooneybarger hasn’t played in the big leagues since 2003. Maybe he’d do better as an H.R. Pufnstuf character.

JUNG BONG Sounds like a character in a Cheech and Chong movie. If the Korean pitcher was about 30 years older, we could have seen a match up with this guy…

JOHN BOOZER It’s one of those match-ups baseball fan dream about…Bob Gibson vs. Nolan Ryan…Roger Clemens vs. Sandy Koufax…but wouldn’t you rather see the outcome of Boozer vs. Bong? It would answer a lot of questions, wouldn’t it?

J.J. PUTZ It’s a pretty bad name. But when you learn what his parents really wanted to name him, you realize he got lucky. I mean, would Topps even print a baseball card with the name Pussyfart McQueef?





DOE BOYLAND I just like this one because it sounds like the name of Michael Jackson’s next estate.

COCO CRISP Mmmm…Coco Crisp

The Bizarre, The Bad, The Bawdy Baseball Names - Gaylord 2

Via digg story methodshop


FacebookTweetPinLinkedIn
Previous Post:@ Promax/BDA: Former President Clinton: ‘It’s The Branding, Stupid’
Next Post:Sean Connery will not return for Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Sidebar


Popular Posts

robot reporter

Job Automation Using ChatGPT Could Make These Jobs Obsolete – Is Your Job On This List?

nbc chimes feature scaled

The Surprising Story Behind The NBC Chimes

lg tv disable home screen scaled

How To Change The Default LG TV Home Screen To Live TV

sleepless bear

20 Famous People Who Are Members Of The Sleepless Elite

google naked

7 Pictures Of Naked People Captured By Google’s Cameras

Caddyshack Quotes

30 Famous Caddyshack Quotes That’ll Make You Laugh

rooftop woman

10 Naked Sunbathers Busted By Google Earth

harrypotter sex

Controversial Nimbus 2000 Vibrating Harry Potter Broomstick Has Parents In An Uproar

dmas top usa

Top 200 Nielsen DMA Rankings (2023) – Full List

dvd rewinder scaled

The Amazing DVD Rewinder: Be Kind And Rewind Your… DVDs?!


Categories

Advertising Apps Business Crime DIY & Tutorials Entertainment Family Featured Food Games Health & Science Holiday Humor Internet Learn Life Music News Politics Reviews Security Sex Social Media Software Style Technology Travel TV & Film Uncategorized



radio studio

The Future Of AM Radio: 4 Ways AM Radio Stations Can Survive The EV Car Revolution

The future of AM radio is uncertain. The legacy medium faces a variety of challenges from podcasting to an aging user base. But AM radio’s …


electromagnetism, frequency, radiation, Electromagnetic frequencies

5 Things Blocking The Efforts To Save AM Radio

On November 2, 1920, the AM radio station KDKA announced the live U.S. Presidential election results between Warren G. Harding and James Cox (spoiler: …


Recent Posts

radio studio

The Future Of AM Radio: 4 Ways AM Radio Stations Can Survive The EV Car Revolution

Intense woman listening to AM radio with headphones

7 Reasons To Save AM Radio In Cars

electromagnetism, frequency, radiation, Electromagnetic frequencies

5 Things Blocking The Efforts To Save AM Radio

There's no AM Radio In Tesla Cars

Why Electric Car Manufacturers Want To Kill AM Radio

The ChatGPT iOS App on an iPhone

OpenAI’s ChatGPT iOS App Is Now Available For iPhone, iPad

Cute Baby Wrapped In A White Towel

The Top 100 Most Popular Baby Names Over The Last 100 Years (1923-2022)

Caddyshack Quotes

30 Famous Caddyshack Quotes That’ll Make You Laugh

what does dna stand for

What Does DNA Stand For (Do You Know The Answer)?

Tutorial on how to remove your info from FastPeopleSearch

How To Remove Your Info From FastPeopleSearch

maxresdefault 25

Incredible Mashup Of All The Inception Dream Layers In Real Time

Jump to comments

About

MethodShop’s mission is to entertain, inform, and sometimes gross you out. MethodShop has affiliate relationships, so we may get a small share of the revenue from your purchases. Items are sold by the retailer, not by us. All prices are subject to change.

Follow

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram
  • YouTube
  • Pinterest

Trending Posts

robot reporter

Job Automation Using ChatGPT Could Make These Jobs Obsolete – Is Your Job On This List?

nbc chimes feature scaled

The Surprising Story Behind The NBC Chimes

lg tv disable home screen scaled

How To Change The Default LG TV Home Screen To Live TV

Latest Posts

radio studio

The Future Of AM Radio: 4 Ways AM Radio Stations Can Survive The EV Car Revolution

Intense woman listening to AM radio with headphones

7 Reasons To Save AM Radio In Cars

electromagnetism, frequency, radiation, Electromagnetic frequencies

5 Things Blocking The Efforts To Save AM Radio

MethodShop Animated Zoom Icon
  • About
  • Submit
  • Disclaimer
  • Privacy Policy
  • Contact
  • Subscribe
  • Store

Copyright © 2023 MethodShop · All Rights Reserved