Known for its mind-blowing ending, The Usual Suspects is a modern classic mystery film with a great script. Keep reading for our list of the best Usual Suspects quotes.
The Usual Suspects is one of those movies that when you find someone who hasn’t seen it yet, you get both jealous and excited at the same time. The film tells the story of a group of criminals who plot a crime together after a chance encounter in a police lineup. However, things quickly fall apart when they discover that they’ve accidentally crossed one of the most feared and dangerous criminals in the world, Keyzer Soze.
First released in 1995, the Bryan Singer-directed film features a cast of future A-list actors in the early stages of their careers including Kevin Spacey and Benicio del Toro. While The Usual Suspects is primarily remembered for its brilliant casting and unforgettable ending, the film is full of incredible quotes. Between Christopher McQuarrie‘s great script and the cast’s clever ad libs, there are plenty of memorable Usual Suspects quotes that stand out. From lines that will make you laugh to ones that will make the hair on your neck stand up, here are the best Usual Suspects quotes.
Usual Suspects Cast
In case you haven’t watched The Usual Suspects lately, here’s a list of the main cast and their character names. It will make reading these quotes easier to follow.
- Stephen Baldwin … McManus
- Gabriel Byrne … Keaton
- Benicio Del Toro … Fenster
- Kevin Pollak … Mr. Hockney
- Kevin Spacey … Roger “Verbal” Kint
- Chazz Palminteri … Dave Kujan
- Pete Postlethwaite … Kobayashi
- Peter Greene … Redfoot the Fence
- Suzy Amis … Edie Finneran
- Dan Hedaya … Jeff Rabin
“Hand me the keys…”
- Interrogation Cop: Number 1, step forward.
- Hockney: Hand me the keys, you f**king c**ksucker.
- Interrogation Cop: Number 2, step forward.
- McManus: Give me the f**king keys, you f**king c**ksucker motherf**ker, aaarrrghh.
- Interrogation Cop: Knock it off. Get back. Number 3, step forward.
- Fenster: (Laughing) Hand me the keys, you c**ksucker.
- Interrogation Cop: In English, please?
- Fenster: Excuse me?
- Interrogation Cop: In English.
- Fenster: Hand me the f**king keys, you c**ksucker, what the f**k?
NERD NOTE: The line-up scene in the Usual Suspects was originally scripted to be a serious part of the film. But according to Kevin Pollak, Benicio Del Toro kept farting and making the cast laugh. Director Bryan Singer was furious at the time, and couldn’t force the actors to keep a straight face. Trying to salvage the footage, Bryan Singer decided to change directions and edited together a collection of the funniest takes for the scene. And it worked! Benicio Del Toro’s farting helped create one of the most memorable scenes in the movie.
Who’s The Gimp?
- Hockney: F**k who did it. What I want to know is who’s the gimp.
- Dean Keaton: He’s ok.
- Hockney: Says you. How do I know that? What about it, Pretzel-man? What’s your story?
- Dean Keaton: His name is Verbal. Verbal Kint.
- McManus : Verbal?
- Dean Keaton : Yeah.
- Verbal: ‘Roger’, really. People say I talk too much.
- Hockney: Yeah, I was just gonna tell you to shut up.
“How many times you been in a lineup? It’s always you and four dummies.”
- Dean Keaton: How many times you been in a lineup? It’s always you and four dummies. PD are paying homeless guys $10 a head half the time. And there’s no way they’d line five felons in the same row. No way. And what’s a – What’s a voice lineup? Public defender could get you out of that one.
“You are a criminal.”
- Fenster: You do some time, they never let you go. They treat me like a criminal. I’ll end up a criminal.
- Hockney: You are a criminal.
- Fenster: Why you gotta go and do that? I’m trying to make a point.
“What, do you got a team of monkeys working around the clock on this?”
- Interrogation Cop: I can put you in Queens on the night of the hijacking.
- Hockney: Really? I live in Queens. Did you put that together yourself, Einstein? What, do you got a team of monkeys working around the clock on this?
“I can’t feel my legs… Keyser.”
- Keyser Soze: How are you doing Keaton?
- Dean Keaton: I can’t feel my legs… Keyser.
- Keyser Soze: Ready?
- Dean Keaton: What time is it.
- Keyser Soze: 12:30
“You think you can catch Keyser Soze? You think a guy like that comes this close to getting caught and sticks his head out?”
- Verbal: Where’s your head, Agent Kujan? Where do you think the pressure’s coming from? Keyser Soze – or whatever you want to call him – he knows where I am right now. He’s got the front burner under your ass to let me go, so he can scoop me up ten minutes later. Immunity was just a deal with you assholes. I got a whole new problem when I post bail.
- Dave Kujan: So why play into his hands? We can protect you.
- Verbal: Oh, gee, thanks, Dave. Bang-up job so far. Extortion, coercion. You’ll pardon me if I ask you to kiss my pucker. The same f**kers that rounded us up and sank us into this mess are gonna bail me out? F**k you. You think you can catch Keyser Soze? You think a guy like that comes this close to getting caught and sticks his head out? If he comes up for anything, it will be to get rid of me. After that… my guess is you’ll never hear from him again.
“You know a religious guy named John Paul?”
- Dave Kujan: You know a dealer named Ruby Deamer, Verbal?
- Verbal: You know a religious guy named John Paul?
- Dave Kujan: You know Ruby’s in Attica?
- Verbal: He didn’t have my lawyer.
“My piss came out like snot. I’m not kidding, it was all thick and gooey.”
- Verbal: Can I get some coffee?
- Dave Kujan: In a while. Let’s talk about the lineup.
- Verbal: I’m really thirsty. I used to dehydrate as a kid. One time it got so bad my piss came out like snot. I’m not kidding, it was all thick and gooey.
NERD NOTE: Actor Chazz Palminteri, who plays Agent Dave Kujan in The Usual Suspects, is also a restaurateur. From 2011 to 2015, Palminteri owned a restaurant called Chazz: A Bronx Original, in Baltimore’s Little Italy neighborhood. But after his Baltimore restaurant closed, Palminteri opened a new restaurant in New York City called Chazz Palminteri Ristorante Italiano, in New York City.
“I mean like orca fat.”
- Verbal: (Referring to Rabin) That guy is tense. Tension is a killer. I used to be in a barbershop quartet in Skokie, Illinois. The baritone was this guy named Kip Diskin, big fat guy, I mean, like, orca fat. He was so stressed in the morning…
- Dave Kujan: Verbal, you know we’re trying to help you.
- Verbal: Sure, and I appreciate that. And I wanna help you, Agent Kujan. I like cops. I would’ve liked to have been a Fed myself, but my CP…
- Dave Kujan: Verbal, you’re not telling us everything. I know you know something.
- Verbal: I told the DA everything I know.
- Dave Kujan: Verbal, I know you like Keaton. I know you think he’s a good man.
- Verbal: I know he was good.
- Dave Kujan: He was a corrupt cop.
- Verbal: Sure, 15 years ago, but he was a good thief. Anyway, the cops wouldn’t let him go legit.
- Dave Kujan: Dean Keaton was a piece of shit.
- Verbal: Are you trying to get a rise out of me, Agent Kujan?
- Dave Kujan: I just wanna hear your story.
- Verbal: It’s all there. May I have a cigarette?
“You give me one good reason why I shouldn’t kill you right now.”
- Keaton: You give me one good reason why I shouldn’t kill you right now.
“Old McDonald had a farm…”
- McManus: Old McDonald had a farm, ee-eye-ee-eye-oh. And on that farm he shot some guys… Bada bing, bada bing bang boom.
“Whoever’s sleeping is your man.”
- Dave Kujan: First day on the job, you know what I learned? How to spot a murderer. Let’s say you arrest three guys for the same killing. You put them all in jail overnight. The next morning, whoever’s sleeping is your man. You see, if you’re guilty, you know you’re caught, you get some rest, you let your guard down.”
“A man can convince anyone he’s somebody else, but never himself.”
- Verbal: A man can convince anyone he’s somebody else, but never himself.
“Is it Friday already?”
- Fenster: Man, I had a finger up my asshole tonight.
- Hockney: Is it Friday already?
“Are you gonna charge me, dickhead?”
- Arresting Officer: You know what happens if you do another turn in the joint?
- Todd Hockney: (shrugs sarcastically) F**k your father in the shower then have a snack. Are you gonna charge me, dickhead?
“In Guatemala, we used to make fresh coffee, right off the trees… This is shit but, hey, I’m in a police station.”
- Verbal: Back when I was picking beans in Guatemala, we used to make fresh coffee, right off the trees I mean. That was good. This is shit but, hey, I’m in a police station.
“If I told you the Loch Ness Monster hired me to hit the harbor, what would you say?”
- Verbal: I came clean; I told it like it happened on the boat. So what if I left out how I got there. It was so full of holes the DA would have told me to blow amnesty up my ass. So you got what you wanted out of me, so big f**king deal.
- Dave Kujan: So that’s why you never told the DA.
- Verbal: You tell me, Agent Kujan, if I told you the Loch Ness Monster hired me to hit the harbor, what would you say?
- Dave Kujan: Turn state’s evidence; we’ll put you on the stand. We’ll hear it out.
- Verbal: I’ve got immunity now, what could you possibly offer me?
“Yeah, he’s awake. He’s talking like a Thai hooker.”
- (Talking into the phone about Arkosh Kovash who’s in the hospital with burns to his body)
- FBI Agent Jack Baer: Listen, send me someone who can speak Hungarian. Yeah, he’s awake. He’s talking like a Thai hooker.
- (Kovash is speaking frantically in Hungarian)
- FBI Agent Jack Baer: What?
- Arkosh Kovash: Keyesr Soze. Keyesr Soze!
“The strangest thing…”
- Keaton: McManus. What the f**k is going on?
- McManus: The strangest thing… (falls over dead with a knife in his back)
“One Cannot Be Betrayed If One Has No People.”
- Kobayashi: One cannot be betrayed if one has no people.
“Oh, is that the one about the hooker with dysentery?”
- Fenster: I don’t know anything about no f**kin’ truck.
- Interrogation Cop: Oh, yeah? Well, your friend McManus told us a different story altogether.
- Fenster: Oh, is that the one about the hooker with dysentery?
“How Do You Shoot The Devil In The Back?”
- Verbal: How do you shoot the devil in the back? What if you miss?
“I Believe In God, And The Only Thing That Scares Me Is Keyser Soze.”
- (Telling Kujan the story of Keyser Soze)
- Verbal: He lets the last Hungarian go. He waits until his wife and kids are in the ground and then he goes after the rest of the mob. He kills their kids, he kills their wives, he kills their parents and their parents’ friends. He burns down the houses they live in and the stores they work in, he kills people that owe them money. And like that he was gone. Underground. Nobody has ever seen him since. He becomes a myth, a spook story that criminals tell their kids at night. “Rat on your pop and Keyser Soze will get you.” And no one ever really believes.
- Dave Kujan: Do you believe in him, Verbal?
- Verbal: Keaton always said, “I don’t believe in God, but I’m afraid of him”. Well, I believe in God, and the only thing that scares me is Keyser Soze.
“The greatest trick the devil have ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist, and like that… he’s gone.”
- Verbal: After that, my guess is that you will never hear from him again. The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he did not exist. And like that, poof, he is gone.
This is one of the most famous Usual Suspects quotes. It takes place in the final moments of the film while audiences are still trying to process what just happened and the true identity of Keyser Söze.
The Best Usual Suspects Quotes
I wish I could go back in time and watch The Usual Suspects again for the first time. It is such a great movie for so many reasons. Writer Christopher McQuarrie, did a wonderful job with the script and won an Oscar for his efforts in 1996. He worked for a detective agency and a law firm before he became a screenwriter and used his experience to help develop the film’s characters. Most of the character names in the film are references to his former colleagues at these two jobs.
What did you think about our list of Usual Suspects movie quotes? There is so much to choose from that it’s hard to cherry-pick just a few of the best quotes.
Did we leave any of your favorite quotes from Usual Suspects off this list? Please let us know in the comments.