So there is this guy standing outside the Toronto mall. He is asking the question “Why are you closed?” It’s before closing time and there are people in the mall. I would guess one of two things happened here:
- Someone played a prank and locked the doors, causing this guy to go ape @%!*
- This guy was intentionally kept out, as we see the guard walk away. I would guess that he would station himself and call the police for the safety of the other patrons.
- The mall is actually closed because of the G-20 protest.
Still, the guy was pretty persistent. “Why are you closed!?!” pulling on the door handles like they will magically unlock. “Why are you closed! Tell us why you are closed! Tell us why you’re closed! Why, why, why are you closed!?! I want to go shopping in the Eaton center, why are you lo… why are you closing your doors!?! Why are you locking your doors to the public!?! Why? Tell us the reason!?!”
At this time, we see two people have a non-verbal conversation. The guy is suggesting to the woman that she walk to the next entrance ( I would guess, at least). The guard starts moving the other patrons away from the door.
“Why are you putting people through this? Why? Why? Why are you putting us through this? Who gave you the right!?! Who gave you the right!?! Who gave you the right to exclude the population!?!”
Two kids come up – one of them jokingly trying to pass through the glass.
“Who are you? How dare you do this to us! We are the Toronto public! We want to SHOP! We want to get into the Eaton Center! It is a public place! It says it’s open til 7 o-clock! Why are you closed, why? why? Tell us why?”
At this point the man gives up on the door and starts walking away.
“Doesn’t anyone else care? It’s just a spectacle to you, it’s just a spectacle to you!?! It’s just FUNNY? HA HA HA!! Let the police cut off my balls. I don’t mind because it’s the cops and they’re allways right! Right? You wanna go shopping? You don’t give a shit, do you?”
“No, not really.”
All of a sudden the guy goes on a tirade about not being filmed. The author reminds him he is in a public place (as he mentioned earlier).
“But it’s Closed!” After the guy argues about public and private, the guys says “Oh, you’re going to explain it to me? Well tell me why they are closed?”
“I don’t know, Cadillac Fairview doesn’t want you in.”
“Oh Cadillac Fairview doesn’t want ME in? That’s why they closed the whole place?”
“Apparently…”
“Are you nuts? Are you crazy? I just walked over here….”
That was all we got. Except for this Autotune version…
Or maybe this parody of “Why are you closed?”
Or maybe the rant about how Windows are not as important as human beings…
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