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Home : Humor : 9 Crazy Tabloid Headlines About Cats

Ridiculous Tabloid Headlines (About Cats)

9 Crazy Tabloid Headlines About Cats

Apparently, the CIA is breeding obese cats that can talk, fly to Mars and kill! Here are some crazy tabloid headlines about cats.

June 12, 2009 by jayfrankwilson
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Elvis, Bigfoot, Hitler, Bat Boy, and David Hasselhoff’s drinking problem are just a few of the crazy tabloid headlines that you might find on a typical tabloid magazine cover. However, we’re starting to notice a new cover trend… cats! Apparently, the CIA is breeding obese cats that can talk, fly to Mars and kill! All of this sounds like one of Lloyd Kaufman‘s whacky Troma movie plots. Here are some of the most absurd tabloid cat headlines ever printed.

The World’s Biggest Cat

From Weekly World News comes this headline” “World’s Biggest Cat!” At 78 pounds, this cat weighs as much as an 11-year-old boy. He eats 90 cans of tuna a week.

World'S Biggest Cat: 78 Pounds!
World’s Biggest Cat: 78 Pounds! (Weekly World News)

Fat Cat Babies

On the cover of this special double issue of Weekly World News is this irresistible headline “World’s Fattest Cat Has World’s Fattest Kittens!”

World'S Fattest Cat Has World'S Fattest Kittens!
World’s Fattest Cat Has World’s Fattest Kittens! (Weekly World News)

Alien Cats on Mars

Here’s another great tabloid headline from Weekly World News. While humanity only dreams of planetary space travel, cats are already on Mars.

Strange Breed Of Cats Found On Mars!
Strange Breed of Cats Found on Mars! (Weekly World News)

Vampire Cats

How do you capture a vampire cat? According to the Weekly World News, with a bowl of human blood. Question is, where did they get the blood?

Vampire Cat Captured!
Vampire Cat Captured! (Weekly World News)

Killer Cats

With a headline like “Kitten Guilty Of Murder!”, you better watch your back around this Deathrow cat. Don’t forget to sign the petition or the kitty dies.

Tabloid Cat Headline: Kitten Guilty Of Murder!
Kitten Guilty of Murder! (Weekly World News)

Killer CIA Cats

Cia Breeds Killer Kitten &Amp; She'S On The Loose
(Weekly World News)

The Santa Cat

Ho-Ho, meow? The “World’s Fattest Cat Saves Christmas!” Our favorite part of this cover is the call out that says, “You’ll Never Guess How Chubby Did It!”

Tabloid Cat Headline: World'S Fattest Cat Saves Christmas!
World’s Fattest Cat Saves Christmas! (Weekly World News)

Talking Cats?!

The silly CIA is at it again! This time they are making a cat that can talk and be a spy in Iraq. Watch out 007, there’s a cat coming for your job.

Talking Cats - Crazy Tabloid Headlines About Cats
Talking Cats (Weekly World News)

Pimp Cat

This fat cat is a pimp! He “owns” 23 old ladies. The question is what does he do with these old ladies? Play Bingo? Watch reruns of The Golden Girls?

Tabloid Cat: Fat Cat Owns 23 Old Ladies
Fat Cat Owns 23 Old Ladies (Weekly World News)

Crazy Tabloid Headlines About Cats

Why did you think about these tabloid headlines about cats? Were they funny or just too stupid to print? Let us know in the comments?

Crazy Tabloid Headlines About Cats — #cats #cat #meow #cutecats #cathumor #catlover #catlovers #catscatscats
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Category: Humor Tag: Animals, Bat Boy, Bigfoot, Cats, lloyd kaufman, troma
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